[nukkad] Fw: From Rajababu-Communication gaps

["rajababu" <>]

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Sent: Saturday, December 23, 2000 11:16 PM
Subject: From Rajababu-Communication gaps


> Comment of Rajababu:
> What happens when the best of managers give out misleading communication?
> the result is disastrous. Educated, technically qualified people can goof
up
> on the most mundane of things. Nobody is above the law. Everyone is on the
> firing line as far as communication is concerned. The higher you go in an
> organisation, the more isolated you become in terms of people talking to
> you. Even if you make a mistake in some correspondence, few would assume
> that it is wrong. They will quote you as if you were God. I am giving
below
> two case studies, one a set of real life goof-ups and the second being a
> parody. Both deal with aspects of communication.
>
> Now read on
>
>
>
>
> Case Study1
>
>       A magazine recently ran a "Dilbert Quotes" contest.    The writers
>      were looking for people to submit quotes    from their REAL-LIFE
>      Dilbert-type managers. Here are    some of the submissions:
>
>      1. As of tomorrow, employees will only be able to access the building
>      using individual security cards. Pictures will be taken next
Wednesday
>      and employees  will receive their cards in two weeks. (This was the
>      winning entry; Fred Dales at Microsoft Corporation in Redmond, WA)
>
>      2. What I need is a list of specific unknown problems we will
>      encounter. (Lykes Lines Shipping)
>
>      3. How long is this Beta guy going to keep testing our stuff?
>      (Programming intern, Microsoft IIS Development team)
>
>      4. E-mail is not to be used to pass on information or data. It should
>      be used only for company business.
>      (Accounting Mgr., Electric Boat Company)
>
>      5. This project is so important, we can't let things    that are more
>      important interfere with it.    (Advertising/Mktg. Mgr., UPS)
>
>      6. Doing it right is no excuse for not meeting the schedule. No one
>      will believe you solved this problem    in one day! We've been
working
>      on it for months. Now,    go act busy for a few weeks and I'll let
you
>      know when    it's time to tell them. (R&D Supervisor, Minnesota
Mining
>      & Manufacturing /3M Corp.)
>
>      7. My boss spent the entire weekend retyping a 25-page proposal that
>      only needed corrections. She claims    the disk I gave her was
damaged
>      and she couldn't edit    it. The disk I gave her was write-protected.
>      (CIO of Dell Computers)
>
>      8. Quote from the boss: "Teamwork is a lot of people doing what 'I'
>      say." (Mktg. executive, Citrix Corporation)
>
>      9. My sister passed away and her funeral was scheduled for Monday.
>      When I told my boss, he said she    died so that I would have to miss
>      work on the busiest    day of the year. He then asked if we could
>      change her    burial to Friday. He said, "That would be better for
>      me." (Shipping Executive, FTD Florists)
>
>      10. We know that communication is a problem, but the company is not
>      going to discuss it with the employees.    (AT&T Long Lines Division)
>
>      11. We recently received a memo from senior management saying, "This
>      is to inform you that a memo    will be issued today regarding the
>      subject mentioned    above." (Microsoft, Legal Affairs Division)
>
>      12. One day my boss asked me to submit a status report to him
>      concerning a project I was working on. I asked him if tomorrow would
>      be soon enough. He said, "If I wanted it tomorrow, I would have
waited
>      until tomorrow to ask for it!" (New Business Mgr., Hallmark    Cards)
>
>      13. As director of communications, I was asked to    prepare a memo
>      reviewing our company's training programs and materials. In the body
>      of the memo one of the sentences mentioned the "pedagogical approach"
>      used by one of the training manuals. The day after I    routed the
>      memo to the executive committee, I was called into the HR Director's
>      office, and was told that the executive VP wanted me out of the
>      building by lunch. When I asked why, I was told that she wouldn't
>      stand for "perverts" (pedophiles?) working in her company. Finally he
>      showed me her copy of the memo, with her demand that I be fired, with
>      the word "pedagogical" circled in red. The HR Manager was fairly
>      reasonable, and once he looked the word up in    his dictionary and
>      made a copy of the definition to    send to my boss, he told me not
to
>      worry. He would take care of it. Two days later a memo to the entire
>         staff came out, directing us that no words which could not be
found
>      in the local Sunday newspaper could be used in company memos. A month
>      later, I resigned. In    accordance with company policy, I created my
>      resignation letter by pasting words together from the Sunday paper.
>      (Taco Bell Corporation)
>
>      14. This gem is the closing paragraph of a nationally-circulated memo
>      from a large communications company:" Lucent Technologies is
>      endeavorily determined to promote constant attention on current
>      procedures of transacting business focusing emphasis on innovative
>      ways to better, if not supercede, the expectations of quality!"
>
>
>
>
>
> Case Study 2
>
>  Next Thursday at 10:30 Halley's Comet will appear over this area. This
is
> an event which occurs only once every 75 years.  Notify all directors  and
> have them arrange for all employees to assemble on the Company lawn  and
> inform them of the occurrence of this phenomenon.  If it rains, cancel
the
> day's observation and assemble in the auditorium to see a film about  the
> comet.
>
>  Memorandum
>  From:  General Manager To:  Managers
>
>  By order of the Executive Vice President, next Thursday at 10:30,
Halley's
> Comet will appear over the Company lawn.  If it rains, cancel the day's
work
> and report to the auditorium with all employees where we will show films:
> a phenomenal event which occurs every 75 years.
>
>  Memorandum
>  From:  Manager To:  All Department Chiefs
>
>  By order of the phenomenal Vice President, at 10:30 next Thursday,
Halley's
> Comet will appear in the auditorium.  In case of rain over the Company
lawn,
> the Executive Vice President will give another order, something which
occurs
> only every 75 years.
>
>  Memorandum
>  From:  Department Chief To:  Section Chiefs
>
>  Next Thursday at 10:30 the Executive Vice President will appear in the
> auditorium with Halley's Comet, something which occurs every 75 years.  If
> it  rains, the Executive Vice President will cancel the comet and order us
> all out to our phenomenal Company lawn.
>
>  Memorandum
>  From:  Section Chief To:  All EA's
>
>  When it rains next Thursday at 10:30 over the Company lawn, the
phenomenal
> 75 year old Executive Vice President will cancel all work and appear
before
> all employees in the auditorium accompanied by Bill Halley and his Comets.
>
>
>  MORAL: After all is said and done, much is said and little is done.
>
>
>





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