[nukkad] A Chemical Analysis of Woman:

[Mohammed Siddiqui <>]

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All art, all education, can be merely a supplement to nature. 
-Aristotle (B.C. 384-322) 
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A Chemical Analysis of Woman:
Element	: Woman
Symbol 	: WO
Discoverer	: Adam 
Atomic Weight:Accepted as 118 but is known to vary from 100 - 160 lbs. 
Occurrence: Surplus quantities in all urban areas. 

Physical Properties: Surface usually covered in a painted film.
Boils at nothing, freezes without reason. 
Melts if given proper treatment. 
Bitter if used incorrectly. 
Found in various states, ranging from virgin metal to common ore.

Chemical Properties: Possesses great affinity for gold,
silver, platinum and other precious metals.
Able to absorb great quantities of expensive substances.
May explode spontaneously if left with a MALE.
Insoluble in liquids but activity greatly increased 
by saturation in alcohol.
Yields to pressure applied to correct points.

Uses: 
Highly ornamental especially !in sports cars.
Most powerful money-reducing agent known to man.
Can be a great aid in relaxation.

Tests: 
Pure specimen turns a rosy tint if discovered in natural state.
Turns green if placed beside a better specimen.

Caution:
Highly dangerous except in experienced hands.
Illegal to possess more than one except in certain areas.

Mohammed  Siddiqui 
!!Smile!! 2003




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