[nukkad] Learn to live life-Rajababu

["rajababu" <>]

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> STOP WORRYING AND START LIVING WELL
>  
> Like everyone, you'll regularly encounter circumstances that can
> cause anxiety. The world around you may not change, but you can.
> If you respond to stressful circumstances in healthy ways, you
> can free yourself from anxiety's grip and live the abundant life
> God wants for you.
>  
> Here are 12 steps to take on your journey away from anxiety:
>  
>   * 1. "Admit that anxiety can be known and managed." You can
>     determine the source of your anxiety, then figure out how to
>     combat it.
>  
>   * 2. "Recognize that because of the presence of choices, fear
>     does not have to result in emotional paralysis." In every
>     situation, you do have choices. Those choices may not always
>     be pleasant, but they exist nonetheless. You don't need to
>     feel anxious about being powerless, because you do have the
>     power to act according to how you decide is best. God has
>     given you a mind that is capable of sound decisions, and He
>     stands ready to help you make them if you pray for guidance.
>  
>   * 3. "Learn to distinguish what you can and cannot control,
>     then live accordingly." It can be good to control certain
>     aspects of life, such as by organizing your activities to
>     enable you to fulfill a certain purpose or resisting the
>     temptation to act solely on raw emotions. However, certain
>     aspects of life are beyond your control - and so are other
>     people and how they choose to live their lives. If you seek
>     to control another person or a situation over which you have
>     no power, you'll experience anxiety. Anxiety will also result
>     if another person tries to control you. You can respond to
>     these situations by realizing that irresponsibility can and
>     will happen, allowing others to experience the consequences
>     of their own choices, recognizing the limits of what you can
>     do and not pushing yourself or allowing others to push you
>     beyond those limits.
>  
>   * 4. "Recognize that you alone are ultimately responsible for
>     defining your own guidelines for life." Trying to live up to
>     the expectations of others can cause anxiety when those
>     expectations don't match your own. Recognize that God has
>     created you to be unique; you don't have to cave in to
>     pressure to conform to others' ideas of how you should live.
>     Give yourself permission to extricate yourself from others'
>     demands and pursue the life God is calling you, uniquely, to
>     live.
>  
>   * 5. "Communicate your anger constructively rather than holding
>     it inward to fester." Anger at unpleasant circumstances in
>     your life may be lurking behind your anxiety. Learn how to
>     express your anger in healthy ways, rather than suppressing
>     it or using it aggressively against others. When you
>     effectively channel energy from your anger, it won't cause
>     anxiety in your life.
>  
>   * 6. "Drop idealistic wishes that hinder you from accepting
>     reality." The ideal scenarios that you imagine for your life
>     may be possible, but they aren't guaranteed. Realize that you
>     may never attain certain ideal circumstances, and accept the
>     reality that life may not unfold exactly as you would like.
>     Recognize that pain is an inevitable part of life in this
>     fallen world, but you don't have to respond to pain with
>     anxiety. Direct your energies toward living calmly and
>     rationally, realizing that God is present with you and will
>     give you all you truly need.
>  
>   * 7. "Realize that your self-directed thoughts of insecurity
>     are the result of wrong input, and that those thoughts can be
>     corrected." You have been created in God's image, with great
>     intrinsic worth. Acknowledge your value even if others don't
>     recognize it. Realize that you are competent to make choices
>     throughout your life and thus can proceed with peace and
>     confidence in doing so.
>  
>   * 8. "Learn to distinguish safe and unsafe people and choose
>     only healthy patterns of relating." Unfortunately,
>     relationships with some people can fuel your anxiety. Don't
>     let the stubbornness, critical attitudes or moodiness of
>     others influence your own behavior. Allow yourself to proceed
>     with your healthy choices despite any negative reactions from
>     others. Distance yourself from people who sabotage.
>  
>   * 9. "Drop the requirement of keeping up a 'proper' front, and
>     let the real you be known." Embrace the courage God can give
>     you to be open with people about yourself. While you should
>     disclose intensely personal information only to people whom
>     you know you can trust, you can be candid in your
>     conversations with others. Stop asking "what if?" questions
>     before relating to people; just be yourself without worrying
>     about how they will react to you.
>  
>   * 10. "Release yourself from stringent performance
>     requirements, accepting yourself as you are." People seem to
>     judge you everywhere you go, but you don't need to be overly
>     concerned about others' evaluations of you. Concern yourself
>     far more with the quality of your character than with an
>     achievement or performance. After all, who you are is more
>     important to God than how you perform at a certain time with
>     a certain task.
>  
>   * 11. "Realize that you can experience self-inflicted anxiety
>     because of poor priorities, then choose priorities that will
>     serve you best." If you're not exercising good stewardship of
>     your resources, you're probably creating an environment for
>     yourself that perpetuates anxiety. Consider how you might set
>     effective priorities for yourself in areas such as financial
>     management, time management and moral choices.
>  
>   * 12. "Know that each problem has some sort of resolution, and
>     commit yourself to being an overcomer." Realize that change
>     is a process, and it may take a while for you to shed your
>     anxiety and grow as a person. The process may not be easy,
>     either. But with determination and persistence, you can make
>     positive changes.
>  
> -----------
>    Les Carter, Ph.D., is an expert in the field of
>    conflict resolution, with more than 20 years in
>    private practice. Frank Minirth, M.D., is president
>    of The Minirth Clinic.
>  
>    Adapted from The Worry Workbook: Twelve Steps to
>    Anxiety-Free Living, by Dr. Les Carter and Dr. Frank
>    Minirth, copyright 2000. Published by Thomas Nelson
>    Publishers, Nashville, Tennessee,
>    www.thomasnelsonpublishers.com
> 


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