[nukkad] Talking to the Wife

["aryaone" <>]

TALKING TO THE WIFE ...

One may talk, but unless you listen half the time, she will inform you that
you never "listen to what" she says.

Talking to her is an intense experience, part gossip, part testing, part
finding out what you are thinking, part considering it wholly irrelevant.

She invests in you wholesale, and casts her lot with you, because she feels
the need to be taken care of, even when she may earn twice more than you.

She assesses her own worth from how committed you are to taking care of her.
A large part of that is how you talk to her, and listen.

In her heart she does not like herself because she knows she has settled for
little at the cost of her liberty. And she takes out this antipathy on you,
because she loves you.

Most of her thinking is contrary and in reverse gear. This is because she is
ancient and has been on this earth long before you arrived and completely
self centered [which is different from selfish, but you will learn].

She is not sexual in the sense you think you are. If she says she enjoys it
it is more to chime in with you, because you think it important, for first
10 years of marriage, with half you mind on your libido, and the rest on
what the Boss thinks of your work.

She by the way dislikes your boss and your best friend, because they vie for
your attention. She is not charitable by nature and will as likely not share
and have you at home. After which she will not talk two words with you.

Don't ever lie to her, but dont always tell the truth. By and large figure
out what she means when she is asking a question, and stay with the bare
minimum answer.

NEVER discuss the new business manager and how she walks and talks and
works. And don't talk too much about your male co-worker because this may
get her thinking you are gay.

Figure on spending two evenings every week with her doing what she wants
[which by and large what you dont want] and you are home free for the rest
of the days.

There is no such thing as a magnanimous woman. She does not understand
charity, sharing you, or having you run about where she cant see you for any
length of time.

This does not mean she wants you near her because she finds you fascinating.
Not really, by and large you bore her because you go on about what great
things you do at work. Her sole interest is the pay packet and the hours you
are out of the house.

The other factors always in her mind is a romantic man, who is practical,
rather than a practical man, who is not romantic.

Find out what is romantic and do it, even when you want to run up the hill.
It matters to her when you talk of her hair or new earring. In this case
don't be too honest with opinions. She knows you lie but will love you for
it.

When she talks to you it is called testing. When you talk, it is
communication. And a large part of that is listening.

If you survive 20 years you will begin to understand real communication with
her.

If you survive 20 more, you will have learned the great art of sitting with
her for 3 hours without a word and rising wholly fulfilled.

What is marriage in the begining tends to become a profound friendship in
later years. Very very very rarely, the two may also love each other. A
large part of which is how well you communicate.

Git it?

Arya.







































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