[nukkad] Labels

["HOMI KAIKOBAD" <>]

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DEPARTMENT OF SLAPLABELS

There is a little known, hush hush Department of Slaplabels in Kabul which
is the very cornerstone of the Taliban Government. It works far into the
night and comes up with, instead of Five Year Plans to feed the rabble, a
series of brilliant Slaplabel Projects which earns the Taliban instant
recognition in the western and world media. Here are some of the projects
which have earned them world renown:

PROJECT HANG THE VEILED LADIES
On every third Friday of the fourth month they catch veiled ladies because
they painted their nails and showed some leg. As a blot on the Taliban
character of staid sanctity, they need to be chastised, so they hang them
dead in the village square, the equivalent of Flora Fountain no less.

PROJECT KILLING THE BUDDHA
The absolute masterpiece was the labeling of Buddha as anti-Islamic and
killing the megalith in Bamiyan Valley. Buddha was accused in Taliban court,
sentenced by the Taliban clergy, and killed dead by Taliban guns, which
obliging Russians and Americans left behind, with ammunition which can last
well into 2020, in a fanfare of well orchestrated still photos handed out to
the news hungry Western media.

PROJECT LABEL THE HINDUS
Everyone picks on Hindus much as they do on Jews. This works out well
because in the name of Gandhi's Ahimsa they Hindus simply do nothing, just
like the Jews did nothing when the Nazi goons ripped out their teeth for
gold and gassed them dead like rats.

One could roll over laughing if one did not have visions of Tolaram and
Ganguly who have cornered the pressed oil and grocery markets in main square
in Kabul since decades. They have to walk from their homes on the third
story to the shop a block away through a hugely crowded market, sporting a
badly made Badge worn on the left chest over the heart. It can't do much for
their esteem when they return home and field the question from the four year
old, "Daddy, what is that, may I wear one too?".

Want to know what logically comes next? It's ...

PROJECT HOUND THE HINDUS OUT
This is well worth it as they hold significant wealth as hard cash and gold
in impoverished Kabul, well earned no doubt, but wealth in any case. They
have the best shops, share of market, and street value as traders.

If they are terrorized and some killed, and maybe some Hindu wives and
daughters popped into veils and hung in the market on the old tree, they
will extern and leave in droves. Then that useless Taliban cousin and the
wife's uncle can grab the shops and prosper.

Blessings on the hard working souls of the Department of Slaplabels. May
they always prosper and their children end up in MIT under false names.

Arya






















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