[nukkad] PARENT CHILD relationship, and

[Amir 'Ali Mackwani <>]

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Easy reading is damned hard writing. -Nathaniel Hawthorne, writer (1804-1864)
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the fol is extracted from an email on 
nukkad which is passing thu a very active phase 
nowadays. (dont miss about British contribution 
during Raaj)
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Actually, there are two aspects of every person or role
which both needs to be fulfilled if a relationship is to
continue, let alone bloom.
 
Take the example of parents and child. Parents are always
discipliningg the child, putting hundreds of dos and don'ts,
forcing him through hundreds of things which he would rather
not have done on his free will, be it learning to walk, or
to speak, or toilet training, or going to school, or not
succumbing to early temptations of play, girls and drugs.
 
See from the eyes of the child when all this is done to him.
He is not aware of long term implications of these things.
And he would rather not have done any single things out of
it, if he could have avoided these.
 
But still a child loves his parents. Why?
 
It is because the sacrifices the parents make for the child.
They feed him, cover his body, shelter his head. they
provide millions of things to him. What for? they could have
lived without a child and have spent all that time and money
and other resources for their own enjoyment.
 
But the thought never crosses their minds, and they keep on
doing it for some 20+ years just because he is their child.
That is the sacrifice which makes the child forget all the
hardships his parents make him go through.
 
If parents bring only hardships and do no sacrifice, the
relationship can't last. children commit suicide or run away.
 
If parents  do only sacrifices and do not discipline the
child, the relationship can't last. children become spoilt
and a threat to themselves and society.
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Now, about a child. A child is always chaotic. He keeps on
creating tiny and big nuisances creating work for his
parents. He breaks things, tears things, dirties things, he
keeps on asking questions, he keeps on complaining, he keeps
on demanding this or that.
 
Why do parents tolerate all this?
 
They do because of the element of creativity in a child.
That creativity is what makes a child alive, and different
from a doll or a toy. when he makes all those lines on the
wall, parents enjoy the drawings he has created which no toy
or doll can create. When he asks uncessant question, parent
try to fathom the state of his mind and perception.
 
If a child is only creating nuisance but shows no
creativity, no parent is going to be happy with him.
 
If a child shows only creativity, and does no nuisance, well
, I am not aware of such a creature ever born in human race.
 
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With such a long preface, if you are recognising that you
(your nation) have the power over the world, what is that
secondary virtue you have that compensates for it, so that a
relationship with rest of the world can bloom?
 
India had been a colony of UK and its proxies for centuries
and they exploited us thoroughly. But there are school of
thoughts in India which credit UK for establishing basic
infrastructure in India without which we could not have
survived for long as a nation or a culture in these changing
times.
 
British established education system, postal system, railway
system, legal system, and what not in India in the duration
of their occupation of our country. Now that the dust of
their departure is settled, we are a more strong country
because of all these things they did. We, as a nation, were
capable of producing a mahatma gandhi who could show them
the door without lifting a finger and without shedding a
drop of blood.
 
Those who recognise these compensating contributions of
british, nurture a mutually fulfilling relationship between
India and UK. Those whose heart pains at recognising any of
these, keep on sufferring ... ... .
 
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When one talks only of power and does not mention whatever
that other compensating aspect is, (responsibility?), it
becomes an empty boasting or bragging and not something that
others who have faced the brunt of it would like to talk
about or listen to.
 
Cynthia ji,
 
How is America's power different from Osama's power?
 
What do you think is the essence of America?
 
-Rawat

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