[nukkad] Aryaji's Dowry quiz

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Tip of the day:  Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It's already 
tomorrow in Australia. -- Charles Schulz 
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Do you subscribe to dowry and will you marry your sons, 
daughters, anyone else you are responsible for, accordingly?

[    ] yes, I subscribe to it.

[ X  ] no, I am against it.

Comments: 

I belong to a small area in Kerala where Dowry system is non-existent. In
the Walluvanad area (comprising of PARTS of present day Palakkad, Trichur
and Malappuram Districts of Kerala) of South Malabar,  it is considered to
be demeaning to talk of such thing during marriage proposals. Marriage
function & feast are organized by the Girl's parents but the transportation
arrangements for the Groom's guests to the venue have to be arranged by the
Groom side. There is usually another feast at the Groom's house when the
bride is brought to groom's house for the first time. If the Groom can
afford it, his mother welcomes the bride with a gift of a gold necklace.
Other close relatives also do the same if they can afford it (like my wife
is going to do for the bride of my sister's son on 30th May). So in a way,
you can say the marriage expenses are also split, though the bride's parents
spend more. 

This is the last vestige of the erstwhile matrilineal system of inheritence
followed in that area among the Nairs. Under this system children of women
born in the family had a share in the property from the day they are born,
but children of male members did not have share. They are supposed get share
from their mother's family.  It really was a sick system evolved for the
benefit of Brahmins and was abolished legally in 1975. Good riddence. But
fortunately, the only good aspect of that system survives till now. It is
that girls are still not considered as Paraya Dhan. Even after marriage, the
girl has as much right in her parent's house as she had before marriage.
Perhaps that is the reason why Dowry system is never practiced in that area.
Even in Walluvanad, among communitites which traditionally followed
patrilineal system, dowry system exists. 

So you see, my answer to the quiz has already been made for me by the social
customs in my area. 

V.K.Venugopal

 


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